Saturday, October 20, 2012

Deferred Pleasure

My reluctance to plan any social activities on a Friday is, I think, more an introvert thing than anything else.  After five full days of meetings, socializing, phone calls and presentations, I need serious down time.  Not to mention I'm exhausted, which again is probably about using every ounce of my energy to present myself as an extrovert during the workweek.

Last night I wasn't tired, exactly, but I had an overwhelming urge to clean my house.  And I mean really clean.  I started pulling furniture away from walls, sweeping underneath, wiping down counters and even Windex-ing my framed artwork. It was about 8:30, and I knew I just couldn't switch gears, so you know what that means.  I went to bed three hours later knowing I needed to walk ten today.

No matter what that day's schedule, or even how tired I am, I am a ridiculously early riser.  I stumbled out to the kitchen. Five-oh-five.  Do you know how much I wanted to put on a pot of coffee and sink into the paper?  If it had been a normal five-mile day, that's what I would have done, but I had some work to do today, as well as a play to attend tonight, so I took off.  It was COLD this morning, not cool.  I had no route in mind, but Banks and I took off down South Congress again, and just a few blocks in, I had a plan. We went all the way to the bridge, crossed over, went left on Cesar Chavez, went down the stairs at the 1st Street Bridge, and started the four-mile loop.  The cold weather was the only thing that made me try this with Banks in tow.  He was straining at the end of the leash, and -- I still can't believe this -- even just a few blocks from home, he never once panted, and we never once stopped for water! 

But my knee.  Why is it so hard to remember my brace?  Probably because it doesn't hurt when I start out; that happens a mile or so into it.  Several times we took advantage of a convenient wall and I stretched out my left leg, providing me a few more blocks of relief. 

We left at 5:20 and got home at 8:16.  That was good enough for me and my aching knee, and I downed three Aleves immediately upon our arrival. 

If I had given in to my desires, I would have languished over the paper, probably made a second pot of coffee and obsessed about how to fit in ten.  How wonderful to get the difficult thing done first thing in the morning, and THEN dig into the paper, coffee and Egg McMuffin with a clear conscience and the knowledge that it's all down hill from here.  But today was also a bit of a cautionary tale.  These long walks are getting harder and harder.  I seriously question whether I'll be able to pull off 26.2 miles before December 31.  It started getting hard at about mile 4. I coped by playing a soothing tape in my head that assured me that my fluid, consistent, reasonably paced stride was working out the kinks in my muscles.  That was more helpful than the competing tape, which went something like "Holy crap, there's probably no cartilege left in this knee, which at this point resembles worn-out brake pads, and my bones are grinding together like metal on metal." 

Call me crazy, but there's nothing to be done about it now.  I don't want to know.  I'll make an appointment with a knee specialist and get the requisite x-ray or whatever else they recommend, come January, but until this thing is over.....I don't want to know.


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