Lance

Lance Armstrong, of course. My boss Mark and I are obsessed with this story.  We pored over the damning 200 page report, and  constantly email each other the latest articles.  We’ve talked for years about our belief that of course he doped, and we’ve watched, fascinated, as that wall of denial crumbled, and last week, collapsed.

I cannot imagine losing your reputation in such spectacular fashion.  How long can he keep up his haughty, “I will not participate in this witch hunt” condescension? Mark is betting that he’ll eventually come clean, write the apology book and try to rebuild.  I don’t think so.  I think the hole he dug is too deep.  My guess is that he’ll withdraw from public life, protected by the considerable wealth that he amassed as a result of our willingness to look the other way, and our need to believe in heroes.

Worse than the cheating – far worse – was the bullying.  Apparently Lance didn’t just provide the drugs for his teammates, he forced them on them, shamed them into getting with the program and threatened to fire them if they didn’t “get serious.”  And when someone dared speak out, he went after them, tried to shut down their livelihoods, ruin them.  Ugh.

You’ve heard me mention his ex-wife Kristin a few times here as one of my favorite bloggers.  Now it’s hard to read her.  I had this naïve sense that there was some sort of “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy among the riders and their wives, but apparently the wives were in it just as deep, and that included Kristin.  I’m trying to imagine what the conversations with her kids have been like.  How do you explain that BOTH mom and dad lied and cheated their way to the success that is now providing such a wonderful life for them?  And that this didn’t represent a momentary lapse in judgment – like, for instance, leaving the scene of an accident in a panic – but a deliberate, premeditated, years-long decision to put success, power and money above all else?

This was what was on my mind during my walk with Banks tonight.  That, and the distant bell reminding me that karma is a bitch, and that every time – EVERY TIME – I take a little too much pleasure in someone else’s downfall, a major humbling is right around the corner.  So I’ll try to stop judging, and start working on a little compassion.  And reminding myself to just keep doing the right thing, no matter how small, for the right reasons.